We have all run across some of, if not all, of these obnoxious golfers. They can take a beautiful day on the golf course and personally turn it into a miserable experience. The only thing worse than playing with one of these people is to be one of them.
If you go through this list, which is in no particular order because we all have our particular favorites, and you come across one and say to yourself, “Well I don’t see the problem with that,” then you are one.
Below is a list that could easily have been two or three times this long if I had included every suggestion, but I just picked some of the majority favorites.
The Butch Harmon Wannabe
He reads Golf Digest from cover to cover and watches the Golf Channel and has decided he can help anybody. The fact that he is a 25 handicap himself doesn’t faze him in the least. His favorite statement is, “Wait, try this.”
The Golf Ball Hunter
The golf ball explorer judges the success of his round based on finding more balls than he loses. While everyone else is getting ready to hit he is checking out likely spots for lost balls. In the event that someone actually has to search for their ball he is intent on finding as many as he can and if one of them happens to be yours that is a bonus.
The Cell Phone Addict
He shows up for a round of golf with his cell phone and never puts it down. He is never ready when it is his turn and can’t help look for anybody’s ball because he was on his phone and didn’t see where it went.
The Range Finder Master
He struggles to break 100, but stands next to the 150 marker and says it is 153 to the pin even though the odds of him hitting the green at all are remote.
The Guy That Never Picks Up
He can frequently be found lining up his putt for a quadruple bogey. His commitment to holing out on every hole can easily a fun day in to a 5 1/2 to 6 hour death march.
The Rules Expert
He takes every rules quiz he can find and sits around reading the Decisions on the Rules of Golf in his spare time. It is mission that everyone in the group strictly adheres to the letter of the rules. He always has a copy of the rules in his golf bag.
The Delusional Guy
He’s the guy that makes the group wait on every par 5 because he is convinced that he is capable of hitting a fairway metal 250+ after just hitting his driver 225. His favorite comment is, “If I catch this flush I can get there.”
You run into this guy in the 19th hole. Anytime anyone makes the mistake of asking him how he played he starts in to a blow by blow account of his entire round and doesn’t stop until he has told you about almost every shot.
The Guy That Walks Because He’s Too Cheap To Ride
I couldn’t find an appropriate picture for this guy but he can be found constantly riding in the empty cart seat or hanging on to the back of the cart. He says he loves to walk, but really doesn’t. He is just too cheap to pay for a cart so he bums rides all the way around. Frequently uses the excuse that it helps pace of play.
Just remember that if you read about one of these guys and say to yourself, “What’s wrong with that?” you may be one of them.